I have always been self-conscious of my wobbly thighs and uber-wide hips, even before I had my son and ended up with wobbly thighs-with-stretch-marks and hips-that-could-straddle-a-Rocky-Mountain (foothill).
Really? You, too? Wow.
There was actually a study* done recently that proved that 9 out of 10 moms (yes, even hot mamas!) believe that they look fat in shorts, and 8 out of 10 believe they look fat in anything revealing. However, a survey of their spouses, significant others, and best friends revealed that none of the women actually look as bad as they think they do.
(I know, that’s what I said, too.)
In all seriousness, ladies, summer is upon us and it’s time for you to face facts and realize that shorts really aren’t your arch-enemy (swimsuits are, silly).
Make Me a Hot Mama’s 5 Short Rules, Or, What To Do if Your Body Doesn't Look Like This:
>
-Distract people! Get a manicure, whip out a great self-tanner, and find a pretty pair of sandals. Not only will you be better for the pampering, but getting compliments on your cute shoes will make you forget about your thighs. :)
-Don't cut your legs off mid-calf with too-long bermudas or capris. Everyone's legs gain a few inches when visually chopped in half at the widest point of the calf. The slimmest-looking point for most people is the tiny space between the bottom of their kneecap and the top of the calf muscle.
-Find a pair that fits! Aim for something that doesn't gape, pull, or bunch...and don't go too big in an attempt to hide. It never works (trust me, I've tried). If you want more coverage, go for a loose skirt that skims over your curves.
-Don't cut your thigh in half, either. Find the mid-point of your thigh, and then get shorts that fall either below or above that line.
-Avoid high-waisted shorts unless you know, for a fact, that you look absolutely sizzling in them.
Buy the right pair, and wear ‘em proudly, hot mamas!
*This particular study was kind of, really, um, not published. Ooops.
Really? You, too? Wow.
There was actually a study* done recently that proved that 9 out of 10 moms (yes, even hot mamas!) believe that they look fat in shorts, and 8 out of 10 believe they look fat in anything revealing. However, a survey of their spouses, significant others, and best friends revealed that none of the women actually look as bad as they think they do.
(I know, that’s what I said, too.)
In all seriousness, ladies, summer is upon us and it’s time for you to face facts and realize that shorts really aren’t your arch-enemy (swimsuits are, silly).
Make Me a Hot Mama’s 5 Short Rules, Or, What To Do if Your Body Doesn't Look Like This:
>
-Distract people! Get a manicure, whip out a great self-tanner, and find a pretty pair of sandals. Not only will you be better for the pampering, but getting compliments on your cute shoes will make you forget about your thighs. :)-Don't cut your legs off mid-calf with too-long bermudas or capris. Everyone's legs gain a few inches when visually chopped in half at the widest point of the calf. The slimmest-looking point for most people is the tiny space between the bottom of their kneecap and the top of the calf muscle.
-Find a pair that fits! Aim for something that doesn't gape, pull, or bunch...and don't go too big in an attempt to hide. It never works (trust me, I've tried). If you want more coverage, go for a loose skirt that skims over your curves.
-Don't cut your thigh in half, either. Find the mid-point of your thigh, and then get shorts that fall either below or above that line.
-Avoid high-waisted shorts unless you know, for a fact, that you look absolutely sizzling in them.
Buy the right pair, and wear ‘em proudly, hot mamas!
*This particular study was kind of, really, um, not published. Ooops.
